Boys

Girls

Changes in your body

You body will get bigger, your arms, chest and legs may become more developed. You will notice the growth of hair on you face, chest, under your arms and in your pubic area, which is the area around your penis. Your penis will also grow. Not all boys will experience this growth at the same time. Some may experience growth earlier, some may experience growth later.

You will notice that your penis gets tough/hard (stand up) at different times - this is called an erection.

When it becomes hard if you are sleeping at nights for example, you might wake up with a wetness in your pants. This is a white fluid which comes from you penis. This is often called "wet dreams" and this white fluid contains sperms which are now party of your becoming a sexual person.

When this white fluid is discharged from the man's penis, the man feels great excitement which many people refer to as a climax or "to cum". Before the man climaxes, his penis is very hard and erect. After the man climaxes, his penis returns to its normal size.

Changes in your body

Your breasts will develop and feel firm and painful when touched. Your nipples will sometimes extend and be erect. Hair will grow under your arms and on your pubic area, which is the area around your vagina. Your body will change, you will become more developed - you will look more womanly.

You will begin to menstruate (having your period). Every month you will get a period, which means that your body is now releasing a tiny round tissue called an egg. If a sperm from the man meets the egg after having sex with this man, then you can become pregnant.

When your body is aroused sexually your vagina will become moist (wet) as it prepares to receive the penis, if you decide to have sex. Your nipples will become erect.

Many girls masturbate. They rub their vagina in the area above where the urine comes out. This area is called the clitoris (or pum pum tongue). The clitoris may be rubbed until the girl climaxes (cums).

Feelings

You will begin to look at people differently. You will find yourself wanting to be close to them and wanting to have sex with them.

You will want to behave in a way to please them. You might dress differently and do things to make sure they notice you and want to be with you too.

Falling in love with one special person might happen. You will feel strongly about many things and you may be confused about all these emotional feelings and changes in your body.

Many of you will masturbate (backing your fist) which is playing with your penis or rubbing it long enough until it becomes hard and you climax (cum).

Peer Pressure - what your friends and other people think of you will be a powerful influence on you. One of the pressures will be to have sex or behave as if you had sex. They will make you think that if you are a man, then you must have sex.

Feelings

The changes in your body will make you appear womanly. You may look attractive as your breasts and bottom and other areas fill out. You may get attention that you have not gotten before.

You might feel ashamed, happy and scared all at the same time about these changes in your body and life. These are confusing times for you and while you may show off your "sexy" self, you may not want the attention it gets.

Make sure that if a person makes advances to you (brings sex arguments to you) and you say no, that you mean no. This is very important for all girls, because if you say no but you don't mean it, persons may think that 'no' doesn't always mean 'no'.

Peer Pressure - what your friends and other people think of you will be a powerful influence on you. One of the pressures will be to have sex or behave as if you had sex. They will make you think that if you are a woman then you must have sex. If you have not had sex then you are not a woman.

Unlike men, girls can get pregnant, therefore sex for girls has completely different meanings. For girls, even though the feelings are there, it is best to abstain (wait) until you are old enough and responsible enough to cop with pregnancy, child birth and parenthood. Sex is a beautiful experience and it should happen with someone you like in a very special way and you should always use protection (a condom).

Girls should make sure that when they eventually have children, that these children know who their parents are.

How should you think about these things?

If a boy has sex it does not make him a man. He is still a boy. A real man will have sex with someone he likes in a very special way, and when he is ready will use protection (a condom).

Becoming a sexual person is a big responsibility and involves sharing in a special relationship with another person. This is a very beautiful experience and you should take care of this very special part of your life.

Many of the things you feel are normal. Wanting to have sex, to masturbate and having wet dreams are not felt by you alone. Others are feeling the same way, and you should not feel ashamed. However, what is shameful, is to force someone to have sex. If a person says no, then this should be respected. Sex must happen only if the other person agrees.

Strong sexual urges are normal, a true man not only has these feelings, but most importantly , he can control them. This does not mean that your "nature" is weak, it means the opposite, that you are strong willed.

Respect sex, respect yourself and respect the person you have sex with.

How should you think about this?

Becoming a sexual person for a girl is a change in life so great that it is hard to understand all that it means. Men will now desire you and say things to you to make you have sex with them, or even love them, but there are ways that you can handle this.

• Understand that when you show yourself off, that not everybody will see you as a young girl, discovering her new body and self. They will see you as a big woman and that you are "looking" for men to have sex with you.
• If big men are attracted to you, and offer you things for sex, this does not make you a woman. You are still a girl.
• A woman is a person who can take care of herself, respects herself, and her body. She will have sex with someone who loves and cares for her and will only have sex when she is ready.

It takes time to become a woman. The fact that your body has changed does not mean that your mind has fully developed. You have to grow and mature in order to handle the responsibility of sex. Your body should not control you. You should control it. This is why you should wait.